Monday, August 01, 2005

 

Adventures of Electric Man - Part I

On what should have been a typically tranquil weekend in Vijayanagar, cries of distress emanate from the neighborhood cable operator's office.

V'nagar Cable Op: H.Q we have a problem. Come in H.Q
H.Q Chief cable Op: H.Q to post. Roger.
V'nagar Cable Op: We have a crisis on our hands. I repeat we have a crisis on our hands.
H.Q Chief cable Op: What is the problem?
V'nagar Cable Op: The clarity of the cable channels is deteriorating rapidly. The subscribers are demanding a solution to the problem.
H.Q Chief cable Op: Post, have you performed all the routine checks and steps prescribed in the manual?
V'nagar Cable Op: Affirmative, performed a thorough check down to the last amplifier.
H.Q Chief cable Op: Are you sure?
V'nagar Cable Op: The subscribers are going to storm the post soon. Over and out.

H.Q Chief cable Op: Crew, we are faced with a serious situation here. Only one person can help us out now.
Crew at the H.Q: And who would that be sir? Abdul Kalam?
H.Q Chief cable Op: No the solution is much closer home. Gowda (his secretary) connect me to hotline of The Electric Man.........

In an underground garage filled with the most complex circuitry and overflowing with state of the art transistors, chips and the works, a phone in the corner rings ....

Tring tring !!!
Electric Man: Hal-lo
H.Q Chief cable Op: I am really sorry to disturb you sir.
Electric Man: That's fine, no problem.
H.Q Chief cable Op: Hope I have not disturbed you in the middle of a chip fabrication procedure.
Electric Man: I don't do serious work on weekends. I was just taking a break. Indulging in one my favorite hobbies.
H.Q Chief cable Op: Oh, I am surprised that you find time for hobbies despite your hectic schedule. So were you in the middle of a book or a game of golf?
Electric Man: Oh no, I was in the middle of mixing Ethanol, Methanol, Osmium and Compound X (it doesn't have name yet, since Electric Man formulated it only a couple of hours ago)
H.Q Chief cable Op: Oh ...Err. Well sir we have a major situation in Vijaynagar. Apparently it ...
(Electric man cuts him off halfway through the sentence)
Electric man. I know the problem and only I have the solution. I will be there right away. Tell your crew to breathe easy.

Electric Man grabs his weapon of choice, The digital multimeter, and dashes to the scene of the action.
At the Cable Op's office.....

V'nagar Cable Op: Help, Electric Man help.
Electric Man: Have you performed all the routine checks?
V'nagar Cable Op: yes yes I have. I swear I have.
Electric Man: uhmmm.......(looks around). Did you increase the gain of the amplifier?
V'nagar Cable Op: Would that work?

Electric Man Slaps the Cable op.
Electric Man: off course it would you moron. I suppose you studied only from Krishna Xerox notes, that explains your poor understanding of fundamentals.

Electric Man goes ahead and increases the gain.
V'nagar Cable Op: It works. It works. Its a miracle.
He turns around to thank Electric Man. But the superhero has vanished.
Background Chorus:
Electric Man, Electric Man,
Friendly neighborhood Electric Man
Nobel and Marconi
He's ignored
Electronics is his reward.
To him, life is a great big circuit
Whenever there's a hang up
You'll find the Electric Man.
Coming soon - Electric Man & the ground point problem and much much more ..stay tuned

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